Cause on the mic I get dumb ditty ditty dumb...

Coming...

I'll break my silence sometime this month.

Every day in April, I'll be uploading poems that are fresh off the dome.

My Lyrical Exercises will be a pain in the ass. But I will do it! So, be on a look out for new poems every-single-day.

Since some of you watch me for my poetry... you're gonna get a LOT of material. Enjoy!

April 1: Murdering Pens (Words = Energy)
April 2: Swan Song (Puzzlement)
April 3: Apathetic (Politics)
April 4: Toy Dark (Pain)
April 5: Spawn (Revenge)
April 6: Scary Thoughts (Revenge - Mature)
April 7: Blindfold (Erotica - Suggestive)
April 8: Freakish Sayings (Erotica - Suggestive Haiku)
April 9: No Poem. Owe myself 1.
April 10: A Word From Our Sponsors (Past & Future)
April 11: Bookmarks (Love)
April 12: No Poem. Owe myself 2.
April 13: Poem #1: @ That # (At That Number) (Regret) Poem #2: The Pursuit... (Perfection)

One thing that sucks about being in caught in a routine every single day is that you slowly forget who you are. I've had not blogged in a while. Nor write any new songs. Nor poems. Let's not even talk about any new web designs. It's "comfort zone" again... and I'm feeling rather uncomfortable.

So, I'm going to break out of it by using a method I actually perfected years ago: learning a new technique within a very short amount of time.

Here's a blog post I have written a while back for Freelance Switch, explaining how to upgrade your skill level within 24 hours. So, I'm going to tackle doing 3.5 web layouts within a day. Wait, 3.5? Yes... I'll explain...

3 of the layouts will be done from scratch. One is somewhat done, but I only have one free day.

How is this a "new technique"? Well, speed is the name of the game here. Since I only have very little time to knock out work with a weird schedule, I must learn new ways of planning and thinking so I can cut wasteful time. So, I'm pushing myself to learn time management skills.

I plan to do it this Saturday. Wish me luck.

I'm in a "creative funk". When I have too much "bookkeeping" work and not enough time to do graphics, music or other creative works, I tend to get lazy about it.

So, how do you guys deal w/ getting out of it?

Otherwise, at the beginning of the month, I finally got my own Driod phone. An HTC Hero.

I love it to death.

4 GB RAM...
320 GB Hard Drive Space...
15.6 Widescreen...
Intel Dual Core...

Dude, you got a Dell (with better Face Tracking features)...

[link] (HP Computers are Racist!)

Anywayz, speaking of racist, I'm about to put up a "end-all" video about the "racist group" BAN.

My laptop was stolen Saturday morning. The whole bag. Even my portable hard drive.

My web design works I've done are now lost forever. "Traveler's Log" and "ProTabs" will not be released as Free Wordpress Themes anymore. The "freakin.lights" design I've done will now be retired.

All BAN ideas that were developed is actually in Google Docs. But designs for that site are now gone.

Pretty much, all the fucking work I've done from Boondocks to Present day is gone. My whole portfolio is gone.

I will rebuild, but for now, I'm pissed the fuck off.

I'll be back next year...

... something finally clicked. But I won't be able to say "I'm back" until next year.

Then all will be revealed. Until then, see y'all January.

Thanks for your patience.

Just so you know...

I am not forgetting about anyone. I'm just dealing with my day-to-day work. I'm not really a work-a-holic, just trying to close up some things before I commit fully to anything.

So, if you're not hearing from me, I apologize. 2009 have not been kind to me. I'm trying to at least get the end of the year and on a high note, not a low one.

In my slow attempt to brand BAN, I'm seeking out administrators for the BAN Fan page.

Unlike the BAN page on DeviantArt, you'll work directly with me (I don't comment on the day-to-day items going on with BAN on dA). We will be keeping the fan page busting with activity.

My work on the actual BAN site has been slow, due to the fact that I have an unstable schedule. So, the development on that is on pause until after October. I need a predictable schedule before I can do anything. (If you don't believe me, look at my blog. Only ONE update in September.)

So, if you want to volunteer for the BAN Facebook fan page, let me know.

Also, sorry for the lack of updates on BAN Twitter. I forget to link that to my tweetdeck. I've done it just now, so you'll see updates everyday now.

So, just to let you know, I got a job for the next couple of months. That's good news.

Bad news? It's in the freakin' evenings.

From Monday-Friday, I won't be able to (fill in the blank) after 6 PM. It will have to be during the day. And I won't be living for the weekends either because I'll be trying to punch in additional hours on Saturdays. During the weekdays, I will be working on getting my projects so I won't have to rely on this job for the long-term (and because I don't like to travel to/from work during the late night/early morning hours. My sleeping hours are f*cked up enough.).

I will try my best to not let this mess up BAN development. It was of a lack of a consistent schedule. I will be able to spend some time on the website and so on, but so far, no "final release" date. Maybe a "beta"... but can't say too much about that yet, kids.

So, other than that, you got a question you've been itching to ask?

Here's something I recently discovered...

Upon reinstalling apps on my computer, I did not install nor think about installing OpenOffice.org ... at all. It didn't even occur to me to install it until I went over a friend's house. The only "offline application" I installed that even operates like Word/Writer is "Windows Live Writer" for my blog. Otherwise, I don't really miss using OpenOffice.org. For my documents, I'm more or less using Google Docs. Since I'm on the web all the time, it only makes sense. Plus, since I installed Gears, I can use it offline as well.

For notetaking, I use Evernote... both on my Desktop and phone. It's like... I really don't miss OpenOffice.org. When I really think about it, I don't really fire up OpenOffice for anything. Speadsheets? Google Docs. Letter writing? Google Docs. Databases? I don't really program databases unless it's a web one, and even then, it will more likely be MySQL, which I can stimulate using XAMPP. (If you don't know what that means, you might want to look into it. I'm too techy for DeviantArt as it is)

Then I realized that there maybe times I have to use an offline Word Processor. So, I installed the lightweight AbiWord. That's right, AbiWord. Not even Writer. So what if I need to do spreadsheets or a database? Well, if I do, chances are, someone else will be taking care of that.

But am I thinking crazy?

What do you use for your documents? Do you use the web document creation tools? If so, which one? Is it any better than Office or OpenOffice.org, or you just don't care? Why do you use them over Office/OpenOffice.Org?

Let me know...

P.S. - WHY did Disney buy Marvel????

P.P.S. - I finally got my Portfolio on deviantArt done. Free free to check it out:

[link]

Yes, my real contact information is there based on the nature of the business and I'm actually using it until my website is ready. It's alright. The calls are all screened. However, don't just call me out of the blue unless it's business and/or I know you REALLY well...

P.P.P.S. - Yes, I'm still doing BAN stuff. Just got no official announcements yet. Until I say "boo", the people running BAN will keep you entertained. I love the job they are doing.

As some of you may know, I used to do a comic with called "Striply Drama". It was my way of putting some original content into the former Life-Remixed.com. Other than that, I like to tell a good story and this was a new route for me to do it. Sadly, Mr. Controversial's part in the comic was only as a temp artist, not as a full-time artist. This was agreed on before the comic was started and I was trying to find a replacement. As my situations went downhill, I have to start cutting down projects. Striply Drama, as much as I hate to cut it, was put on "Dramatic Pause" (my way of saying "hiatus").

While it was on hiatus, I wrote new material and have as 200+ pages of stories for Kirk Roland and his friends. There's even new characters and arcs. But the hardest part was bringing an artist onboard. I tried many sites, including deviantArt. Some artists wanted me to give up control of the comic, others wanted a lot of money, even thought I wasn't making any off the comic. (at least not yet) Then, when I do find an artist that was willing to work with me, I ended up having to put plans on hold because the money simply wasn't there.

So, the next thing I was doing was pretty much drawing the comic myself. However, none of the sketches I've dove I was proud of. I tried pencils, vectors and photoshop. The closest I came to getting a style I like was when I had my wacom pad... before it was thrown away by mistake. So, once again, Kirk Roland sleeps... almost forever.

Then beginning of this year, I found a site called Pixton. They have a comic strip creator where people can make remixable comics. I gave it a try and figured "well, the story is more important to me than the artwork now". I did one page and... well, that was that. I was concern about a few things... mostly "is the story MY story or theirs?" I didn't want stories that I stored up for two years to all of a sudden become the property of someone else. So, I called up the offices...

... which by the way was kind of weird to me. I could not call up people on deviantArt, but I can call these people up...

... anywayz, I called them up and they told me that my story is my story. However, the artwork is their artwork. Hmmm... makes sense. But then I thought "but what if my story becomes too popular? Then what?"

Well, we both have a 15 minute conversation... and I was pleased with the answer. Basically "when the time comes, we will know what to do". Right now, I got a story to tell.

So, I decided today to try out the system, just to see how fast I can punch a story out. The controls will take a bit of getting used to, but I'll figure it out.

Here's a test strip link to show you the comic I'd done as a test.

Should I use this system and push it to the limits artistically (a lot of people did some really cool things with it), or should I settle for hand drawn artwork?

Let me know what you think.

Update: When I posted this journal, I didn't realized that my comic was rated "mature", so it can't be seen by the general public... which means I have to embed it into a page for everyone to see. So, give me a minute to do that.

Update 2: Comic link is back up. It's a flash scroll along.

So, I actually got the laptop back THE day they said I was going to get it back (Yesterdays). I heard so much horror stories with it being months before they get their computers back, but I guess I'm the lucky one. And the laptop is actually running a LOT better than when I first brought it! Yeah, the hinge still needs to be repaired, but it's a minor detail. So, kudos to HP!

My laptop came back to me with the hard drive all cleared, Windows Vista and Crapware on it. Lucky for me, I have a present waiting on my backup hard drive... Windows 7 RC. I decided (with the encouragement of my younger brother) to install Windows 7, even thought it's only a Release Candidate and give it a test run. My first day on it was like... wow... what a FREAKIN' difference!

The customizations, the taskbar! The changing wall paper without installing anything extra! The visuals that actually help you become more productive! Even searching is less of a pain! It reminds me of a well-runned Windows XP... with a lot of extra things... and it's not coming from third-party apps.

Sure the User Access Control thing is still there, but it's less annoying and don't pop up every single time you want to make a simple change! I can control how often and when. The basic "barebones" of the OS was a welcome change.

I heard there's a "Windows XP Mode" for those programs that I need to run in Windows XP, but so far, I don't seem to need it.

The taskbar was a big improvement. It looks funny at first, but soon, you get use to it. It reminds me of the "dock" on Mac OS X. When you have a program running, you hover over an icon and it shows you what windows of that program you have open. You can even "pin" programs on the taskbar. So, there's no more need for a "quick launch". The taskbar also... and this is a weird part... "learns" how you use the computer. Right Click over the Windows Explorer icon and it will show you your most frequent places you been to.

The file organization improved by leaps & bounds. They really went out of the way to make sure that you have one place to put your documents, another to put your music, and so on.

This is what Vista should have been! So, while it sucks that I will have to buy an upgrade, I say that this is a worthy upgrade!

The sad thing about getting the computer back is the reinstallation and setting up of every program I used before, from Launchy to Photoshop and Xara. It literally took me all day to do it. But, it was worth doing it. It made my regretful purchase of a computer that I thought was a good machine at the time (only for it to be slowed down and fail at times) a better machine!

Of course, it maybe a while before I recommend Windows 7 to everyone, but so far, so good!

So... I'm ready to take project names and kick asses! Windows 7 is going for a long haul test!

So, what's with the radio silence? Simple...

... my HP Notebook was having some issues, so I have to send it back to the factory. Lucky for me, it was a problem that they will fix for free.

So, until I get my notebook back, I'm only doing critical things. I even stop tweeting so I can focus on things that will get me a better and more expensive laptop.

Don't worry, I didn't forget you... not at all.

It's been a while since my last update. I'm still dealing with things here and there. I can now safely say with 80% certainty that next week when I will be more active in my own developments instead of investing in other people's ideas. I have to push things aside to pay the cost of surviving. It's been weeks since I updated my own blog, let alone my profile here and content creation is part of my business. (Grammar? Well, I'm still working on improving that. I'm taking lessons and reading on it now! ).

So, I'm going to set some time aside tonight to talk about my vision of BAN. It's pretty simple:

The mission of BAN is to nurture the arts & the written word among Blacks/Black Decedents as well as network and provide support in many forms.

Note that I said "Black" and not "African-Americans". Why? I never like being tied to a land, especially one that I have never been to before. Besides, if I go along with "heritage first/nationality second" titles, I would be "Carib-American", not African. Plus, BET is kinda spoiling the "Black Experience" here and we need to show people something different! (By the way, I have this theory about the "Black Experience", but that's another topic for another day.)

I believe the club should be part virtual/part reality based. Why? Most... er, "American Black Organizations" don't use the power of the Internet. They may have websites, but don't update the sites often enough. It's almost as if the website is the last thought on their minds. To make things even worse, there is a gap between generations. When you fail to keep up with times, your ideals may fade away. Some ideals are good to keep, others you have to rethink and refresh.

So, the virtual part is to reach as many people as we can reach. The reality part is to come together to stand for something bigger than ourselves.

Is this club about black pride? Well, it's part of that, but not really the whole answer. It's more about giving people a place to express themselves and getting a community going so that we can build together. This is no different from Fraternities and sororities; we're just developing a network and community among ourselves.

Do we only want Black and minors? Yes.
Why? It's simple, look at the mission statement.
Am I looking to extend outside the black community? No.

I am not saying this to be harsh, I'm just saying that even thought we are growing up in a time where racial harmony is now being encouraged, sometimes, there are people who want to be reminded of who they are, or feel part of something special. We can never change what's on the outside, but as long as members of society still have outrageous thoughts about black people, we need to stick together.

Anywayz (ways of any. Inside joke and yes, I meant to spell it with a "z" ), I will talk some more about my vision another day. Perhaps over the weekend.

Next week is a new chapter in my life. Until then...

Late.

P.S. - Officially, the BAN channels on Facebook and Twitter are reserved. I place a hold on them. Twitter account is not active at the moment, but it is  If you see a channel of BAN elsewhere, I didn't authorize it and it does not represent us. While this is not an issue, do not make channels to represent BAN outside of dA without my permission. If you want to follow BAN on Twitter, feel free to. I will be updating it starting next week. It will also appear on #BANetwork's page as well.

... thank you kindly.

So, the da BAN Admins decided to call me "the silent leader". Well... that's pretty much my title.

Something came up and I notified one of the Admins of the club about it. I will post up a blog entry about this trouble in the future.

I'm responsible for the future CSS of the BAN Journal Entries as well as the website, which I have to put on hold because of personal matters. I just like to let you know that I'm still here and breathing.

But I don't like the "Silent Leader" title hanging over my icon...

... so, tell you what. If you want me to give you feedback on your artwork, let me know. I want to see if I can do at least 50 before the end of this week. I'll even post what I commented on.

One Comment per BAN member. Let's see if I can do this.

Ready? And... GO!

Updated: I've written this entry late at night, so I caught some grammar errors.

Officially, I prefer the "Admins" to me called "Co-Moderators". "Co-Assistant Admins" or "Co-something" because there's more than one moderator moderating the conversations within BAN on dA. This will be less confusing.

There are separate divisions of BAN, but for now, dA is the only one. When the website is launch, there will be more channels, such as MySpace, Facebook (I reserved a Fan Page there), Twitter (reserved), and other social media channels.

I will start commenting a few pieces a day for the rest of the week. So, please be patience with me.

Amount of Pieces I Commented On: 4
(P.S. These are random pieces I've done.)

- [link]
- [link]
- [link]
- [link]

Update (June 25): I will get to everyone eventually. It's hard finding free time in during an emergency.

It's been a while since I've been doing some serious designing. Yes, I'm still working on freakin.lights, but I'm also working on other things.

Working on my business site alone will not bring bread to the table (but it would help to bring Whole Grain bread to the table, and not just cheap wheat bread. That's another story, tho.). As you can see, taking care of myself is the only reason that I'm staying quiet. But I do got some news...

I've taken a liking to Twitter, so I'm launching a unique special on Twitter backgrounds. I'll be doing commissions at a ridiculous low price for a limited number of designs. How many? 30. In order to make quick turnovers, I'm going to place "limiters" on the commission pieces. It's going to be interesting to see how this will turn out, especially since the price I'm offering is actually going to undercut a lot of people who does graphics for a living.

The other news? Well, it's BAN. So far, almost 4 weeks and BAN's been pretty active. But I'm the "silent partner" of BAN. My main duty is to fix up BAN's main website. However, my duty is a little deeper than that. Everyone got an idea of how deep, but that was months ago. I decided to change the idea to fit the community better. There's a reason why it's called the "Black Artist Network" and not the "Black Artist Club". So far, the current exercises are showing potential. But I have a bigger goal in mind. I've been reading on "structures" as of late and I'm going to announce within due time what that structure will be. For now, I'll keep it to myself.

So, let's keep things moving for now.

A few days ago, I made "freakin.lights" design on my site live. I'm still pounding out the design, but as you can see, I almost made it into a reality.

Check out the progress and give me feedback via e-mail or in this journal entry.

[link]

As you guys might be able to tell the "freakin.lights" layout is my first real art project in years. To the point where I'm become anal about the quality of the work. When I say "Quality", I mean of microscopic details. If you been following progress and jump between WIP3 and 4, you'll noticed some small details that makes freakin.lights even better.

WIP5 will show something I total missed: rollover and active buttons. It will also show a "date badge" as well as what a blog post will look like. I'm experimenting with different fonts, spacing them out and paying close attention to CSS rules so I won't be disappointed when trying to convert the file to an actual Wordpress theme.

Pulling this off is pretty much my life at the moment. So, let's see if after 18+ hours of designing, manipulating, nudging, deleting, of ONE Photoshop file will result in the big payoff.

Today, I slice, dice and code.